Self-Soothing with Smells

And so we have reached "smell", the last of our five senses for self-soothing!  Since smells can be powerfully linked to memories, it is important to think carefully about which fragrances and aromas are soothing for you as an individual, and which can be triggering and remind you of sad or difficult times.  You may choose to use smells that remind you of happy times, good people, or lovely places, or just fragrances you find pleasing.

Here are some more ideas.

Now you have self-soothing ideas for all of the senses you can pick and choose which work best in which situations or for specific moods for you.  You may find the most effective self-soothing activities combine senses, for example, taking a scented bubble bath, or lying on the grass in the park where you can watch the clouds, feel the sun on your skin, and listen to the birds.

What works best for you?

I hope to see you again soon.

The Bear 

xXx

Self-Soothing with Vision

One of the many ways we can make ourselves feel better when things are tough is by looking at or watching something which is either soothing or enjoyable.  For some people, this might be watching the clouds drift by, and for others it might be watching a dance performance or a favourite television show.  There are many ways to self-soothe using vision.

Here are some more ideas.

You can also self-soothe with touch, sounds, taste, and smell.

Why not make a list of the most effective techniques for you?

I hope to see you again soon.

The Bear 

xXx

Self-soothing with Touch

Today's post continues the topic of self-soothing with the senses, and focuses on touch.  How much we like to be touched by other people can be variable, with some people being very tactile and affectionate, and others quite reserved with a need for a lot of personal space.  We might also enjoy physical contact when we are in some moods but not others.

Fortunately, self-soothing with touch does not necessarily involve physical contact with others.  It may be more about sensations on our skin from nature (e.g. the sun or rain) or from caring for ourselves (e.g. by applying moisturiser or having a shower).

Here are some other ways to self-soothe with touch.

Why not check out how to self-soothe with taste or sound?

Check back for more posts on self-soothing with the senses.

The Bear 

xXx

Self-Soothing with Sound

Self-soothing involves applying techniques we have learned to help us feel better when we are distressed, depressed, anxious, or angry.  Some of us are already very good at self-soothing, but others have not yet found helpful ways to feel better or struggle to give themselves permission to do so.

Self-soothing using our senses can be very effective.  Check here for ways to self-soothe with taste and check back for future posts to find ways to self-soothe with other senses.

Today's brief post focuses on sound.

Here is a brief list of ways you can self-soothe with sound.

Make a list of your own ideas and favourites and put it somewhere you'll notice it when you're having a hard time so you can give self-soothing with sound a try.

I hope this has been helpful.

Check back for self-soothing with vision.

The Bear 

xXx

Self-Soothing with Taste

Self-soothing is all about comforting, nurturing, and being kind to yourself when you are distressed, anxious, overwhelmed, or feeling vulnerable.  It is about telling yourself it's okay to have your feelings, but also helping you to survive them and feel better.  For me, self-soothing is a lot about comfort.  It is the equivalent of someone looking after you when you are ill, bringing chicken soup, tucking you up in bed, and being generally kind and caring towards you.

Self-soothing can include any or all of the five senses.  This short post focuses on taste.  Good food and drink can be a great way to self-soothe, but please remember it may be less useful if you have an eating disorder or use food to avoid your feelings.

Some ways to self-soothe with taste include:

- Drinking your favourite hot drink.

- Treating yourself to a dessert.

- Sampling flavours at an ice cream shop.

- Enjoying some seasonal fruit.

- Chewing gum or sucking boiled sweets.

- Having your favourite meal.

- Eating your food mindfully, focusing on taste.

- Treating yourself to a freshly squeezed juice or smoothie.

- Having a soothing peppermint tea.

- Combining touch and taste by having something cold, like an ice lolly.

- Having something hearty and comforting to eat, like a stew.

Do you have any other ideas for self-soothing with taste?

Check back for my next post on self-soothing with sound.  

Thanks for popping by.

The Bear xXx

Self-Care & How to Survive Stress with the PLEASE Skill (DBT)

Last week was Mental Health Awareness week and the theme was Stress.  I chose to share the PLEASE skill as a way of surviving stress, but it is so much more than that!  The PLEASE skill is a DBT skill which focuses on self-care, and this is incredibly important, because we so often forget or overlook the importance of this.  In many ways, we often mistake self-care for indulgence and start to feel like our needs are unimportant as long as everyone else is okay.  This is where the masks on an aeroplane analogy comes in; putting your mask on first keeps you fit to help everyone else, if this is what matters to you.

So here is the PLEASE skill, which focuses on ways of keeping yourself physically and emotionally well.  If you or someone you care about is having a really bad time or is in crisis, these are the basics.

PL - Treat Physical Illness

We are all guilty of ignoring illness or letting ourselves get run down.  Maybe we think we've had too many sick days recently.  Maybe we think it's just a sniffle and it'll pass.  Maybe we have too much to do to be ill, or just can't face the faff of a long wait at the doctor's, if we can even get an appointment to begin with.  Being physically unwell has an influence on our mental health, leaving us feeling tired, run-down, and more vulnerable to emotions.  Moreover, if we ignore our body's protests we can end up more ill or injured.  It is important that we take time to let ourselves recover, seek medical attention if it is needed, and finish that course of antibiotics as prescribed to give ourselves the best shot.

E - Exercise

Some of us love exercise, and can't beat the high we get from achieving a personal best when running, learning a new yoga position, or scoring the winning goal in a football match.  Others can think of nothing worse.  Exercise might not be one of your hobbies, but it is important, so start small if need be.  Get off of the bus a few stops early and walk the rest of the way.  Climb the stairs instead of getting in the lift.  Ride your bike at the weekend.  Follow a Youtube video in the privacy of your own living room, or head to the gym with a friend to try a class.  Try to do around 20 minutes of exercise per day, and over time, see if you can increase to 30 minutes of exercise that increases your heart rate, five times per week. Feeling stronger and fitter can also boost your confidence which can do wonders for your mental health.  

***As always, this might be one to avoid if exercise is associated with an Eating Disorder or unhealthy coping behaviour for you.***

A - Avoid Mood-Altering Drugs

This might not be the most popular form of self-care, but alcohol and illicit substances are unlikely to be helpful when you are not feeling your best.  Alcohol is a depressant, and is unlikely to improve your mood in the long-term, whilst regulating your mood is more difficult when intoxicated.  We can also easily become dependent on substances to help us avoid our feelings, which will ultimately prevent us from changing our circumstances and overcoming our difficulties.  Self-care might involve facing our emotions and difficulties face on rather than numbing ourselves to them.



S - Balance Sleep

Sleep is incredibly important to our emotional and physical health.  Adequate rest will allow our bodies to recover from physical injuries and illness, and optimise our ability to think and focus.  Being tired can severely impact our motivation and leave us feeling overwhelmed or unable to cope.  Try to set yourself a regular bedtime and develop a routine.  Don't watch television in bed, avoid using your phone, and aim for 7-8 hours of sleep per night.

E - Balance Eating

Last, but by no means least, eat adequately.  Avoid under-eating, as under-fuelled bodies and brains are far from effective.  Try to eat a balanced diet with plenty of fruit and vegetables, but also fats and carbohydrates.  Everything in moderation.  Notice whether you are using food as a way of coping with your emotions, and if so, which feelings you are trying to suppress or escape from.  Try eating mindfully, focusing on tastes, smells, and textures as you eat, looking at what is on your plate, and noticing any sounds (if you can bear to!).

The PLEASE skill is the foundation on which you can build other things.  It is putting your mask on first and ensuring you are fit to care for others, as well as acknowledging that you deserve care and nurturing (YOU DO.).

Take good care of yourself.

The Bear xXx